Last week I read an article on my friend Lindsay’s blog (a guest post by Tara Newman) about how we may be blocking our own success. It really struck a chord in me. I have known that I am someone who can get in her own way, whether that be in my job, relationships, personal happiness, athleticism, etc.
The article led to me thinking about how I’m currently getting in my own way or holding myself back. In the midst of a job search, a boyfriend who lives 4 hours away, and trying to recover (in more ways than one) from the 50 States In A Year project, I know it’s happening. So what’s at the forefront of this problem for me? What is it that causes me to hold myself back and not reach my full potential?
Fear of failure.
I’m not even kidding. It’s fear. It’s like this big bully that just follows me around, makes me question every move and decision, and ultimately holds me back from reaching my full self. I know I’m not alone in this.
I went out for a run Sunday morning and as I did so, it hit me…small things that I could do to move on from this failure and ultimately squash the fear. So here are my 5 ways to move on from failure…
1. Find your therapy
You can take that as literal as you’d like. Go talk to someone to work through your fears (there’s nothing wrong with that!), paint, sing, shop (on a budget! I’m not going to be the reason everyone starts spending their savings at lululemon! 😉 ), or, in my case, run. Whatever lets you dig into yourself, your wants, your needs and provides you that time. For me that’s when I’m out pounding the pavement.
2. Let go of what isn’t serving you
This might be one of the hardest ones. Sometimes this is a habit or a person, sometimes someone you were once close to. If it isn’t lifting you up, it can’t be around anymore. Sometimes this step comes with other consequences and others won’t make it so easy to just let go, but stick to it, you’re doing what’s best for YOU.
3. Find your support team
I am so lucky to have friends, family and a boyfriend who have been there for me. They let me vent, cry and seek out their advice. They’ve held my hand, picked me up and put me down, when that was what I needed from them. I’m extremely lucky to have these kinds of people in my life.
There I said it. And guess what? It’s an okay thing to do! It’s okay to cry and have your moment to be emotional or to do something a bit emotional (within reason, of course). I took my moment and I assure you, there have actually been a few, but it’s important (and healthy) to let out those emotions from time to time.
5. Realize the truth of the situation
Are you confused? You’re not sure what the truth is? The truth is that this wasn’t a failure. There’s always something to gain from these kinds of situations…a lesson, a positive, something GOOD. I battle the end of 50 States in my head on a near daily basis and most of the time, I don’t want to talk about it because it feels like such a failure. But guess what? I raised over $27,000 for 10 various charities; I met thousands of people across the country who were inspired to help give a little something to help those less fortunate; I didn’t fail, I did exactly what I set out to do.
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I know sometimes it’s easier said than done but if you find yourself staring at something you consider a failure, I suggest you take a minute, go through this list and take the necessary steps to move on. You, your health, your sanity and your dreams need that from you!
How do you come back from a “failed” situation?