Stumble over nothing on my own path
Runaway, I am just a nomad
No one ever wanted me to go back
I know I am anything but uncouth
People try to change me since my youth
But I refuse
I can’t remember the first time I heard this song, but I’m almost positive it was shortly after the breakup. I made a note in my phone that it was good and worthy of a Music Monday share and then it was forgotten, lost in a sea of other music that needed to be shared.
Then I was sitting under a blanket with snow falling outside Saturday morning working on blogging related tasks for the week ahead, pulled up the slotted music choice for this week and while definitely still worth sharing, it wasn’t hitting me as hard and that whole writer’s block activity we all dread was hitting hard.
I went back to my list of post ideas and music options for just these kinds of moments and I saw “Refuse” by Kevin Garrett. Honestly, I didn’t remember it at first so I threw it into my trusty Google, pulled up the video and corresponding lyrics, and suddenly it was like magic.
It all came back to me in an instant, but hitting on a whole new level. This time it’s not about break up emotions, it’s about potential, it’s about looking at the path I’m on, the diverging roads in the distance and potential decisions to be made, the road blocks that are popping up and I’m knocking over, almost like one of those “bop-it” games we played as kids.
I’m me. I’m on my own journey and creating my own path and life. It won’t always make sense to everyone and I’m sure in many ways, it doesn’t always make sense to me, but I’m learning to listen to my gut instincts again, remembering that when I don’t is when I get myself in trouble.
So I refuse. I refuse to be anything other than myself. And I refuse to do anything other than live the life that feels right for me.
What do you refuse?