I must admit I went to bed annoyed and crabby Saturday night. I could no longer focus on my todo list or anything that I was trying to accomplish and decided it was just time to put everything away (phone included!) and just go to bed, so I did.
Sunday morning I allowed myself to “sleep in” or at least sleep with no alarm set. I woke up at 5, fell back asleep, woke up at 6, fell back asleep and finally at 7, I woke up and felt ready to start my day. I felt ready to not only tackle my todo list, but write – something that’s been surprisingly difficult for me lately.
I threw Fink’s new album, Horizontalism, in my ears while sipping my Spark and letting the words flow however they came out. I’m being reminded how slow, early mornings are my time; how starting each day for myself makes me a happier and nicer person.
There’s little moments that I miss from before this year – my early morning CrossFit workouts with my fellow Dawn Patrol ladies, eating breakfast while catching up on blog reading, having a “home base” that was your space, and that doesn’t even begin to touch on the people that I miss…
But we’re 7 ½ months into this crazy venture and with 4 ½ more months and 16 states to go, this is no time for me to wallow in self pity, so I assure you that’s not what I’m doing. Rather, it’s the complete opposite.
As I sit listening to the music in my ears, I know I’m blessed. I’m thinking about all of the amazing people I’ve met this year, all of the good we’ve done as a community, all of the places I’ve seen and all of the places I have yet to see. Bank accounts may not be super happy but being blessed isn’t strictly about the money in your pocket, it’s about the feeling in your heart.
I mentioned the other day all of the questions swirling around in my head and I’m not any closer to having the answers today than I did then, and quite honestly, that’s part of what often drags me down, stresses me out and makes me feel extremely overwhelmed and crabby. But right now I don’t need all of the answers.
This journey started out of a crazy idea and a feeling in my heart. It felt right so I followed it and see where it got me? It hasn’t been easy by any means but I’m going to keep following my heart and know that when all is said and done, it’s going to lead me exactly where I’m supposed to be.