I’m trying to re-find my yoga practice because as of late it’s been hiding. I’m not sure if it’s under the bed, in the closet, or if it went on a long walk around the neighborhood, but it’s been missing and it’s time to find it again. It’s time to get back to a consistent practice, it’s better for my body and mind.
Wednesday morning my motivation was once again lacking…I’m not sure why this keeps happening but regardless, I’m trying to do my best to keep balance however that needs to happen. As I kept finding myself putting off my 4 mile run, I found myself toying with the idea of yoga instead. I was lounging on my bed sulking in my own emotions when I decided that today would be the longest day of my life (and leave me physically feeling awful) if I didn’t make myself do something before I went to work. So I put my mat down, I picked out a 25 minute YogaDownload podcast and got to work.
I moved from pose to pose, focusing on my breath, my body and that present moment. That is until I got to dolphin pose. Now I can’t quite explain it but dolphin has never been easy for me even after years of practicing and seeing other poses become easier, dolphin has never been one of those.
The moment I know I’m getting into it the anxiety sets in, knowing what I’m about to face. As I get my arms into place and let my head drop, my neck always holds on making it hard to relax and let it go. And as I lift my legs up getting into the full pose, my shoulders tighten and immediately start shaking. I breathe the best I can, trying to let go of each tight spot but my mind keeps going. Every time I let this pose get the best of me.
I guess it’s like life sometimes and that hill you can’t get over. You psyche yourself out so much that instead of finding the way around, you keep climbing up and sliding back down before you can reach the other side. If only you could learn to breathe then your mind will clear itself of the fog so you can find the best way over or around that hill.
I’m tempted to avoid dolphin pose and instead spend those moments in down dog or child’s pose, or choose podcasts where dolphin isn’t part of the flow. But where would that get me? No where except left with a continued fear for a pose that I’m strong enough to do or an obstacle in life that I’m strong enough to overcome.
Is there a pose in yoga that you try to avoid or leaves you face to face with a tough reality?